Coming Soon: “Spear! Fang! Raygun! The ‘Zine, Issue One” and “Return to Castle Grognard!”

In the next couple of months, I’ll be releasing a new pamphlet adventure, “Return to Castle Grognard!,” which will be my homage to the best and worst of the OSR. After that, hopefully by January (yeah, right), I’ll be releasing Issue #1 of my Spear! Fang! Raygun! ‘zine which does not yet have a catchy title. Anyway, here’s some example art from both to hold you (whoever you are) over until then:

And the WIP cover for the Spear! Fang! Raygun! ‘zine, which is something experimental for me:


Thieves’ Guild Built in the Subterranean Ruin of [Insert Generic Anthropomorphic Urban Rodent God of Your Choice]’s Temple NOW AVAILABLE!

After five years of forgetting about it, I’ve finally completed the book version of my most popular post. You can get it on DriveThruRPG from this link: Thieves’ Guild Built in the Subterranean Ruin of [Insert Generic Anthropomorphic Urban Rodent God of Your Choice]’s Temple.

Welcome to the Thieves’ Guild!

Things are not going so well. The thieves are incompetent and prone to in-fighting. The guild has become more like your local underworld supermarket than the den of intrigue and villainy you’d expect. So, obviously, it’d be a lot of fun to explore.

Inside, you’ll find a decently fleshed-out adventure site for your would-be heroes and/or ne’er-do-wells to infiltrate, pillage, or die horrible deaths in. Also included are a handful of silly NPCs for use in your city campaign. And there’s ratmen. 

(Actually, I checked… There’s no ratmen. Sorry. They’re all dead before the PCs arrive.)

This product is designed using all of the amateurish art, poorly considered humorous prose, and difficult-to-read (and use at the table) layout you’ve come to expect from a classic DIY adventure! (Keyed and non-keyed version of map included as separate files.)

Requires Old-School Essentials Core Rules.

“Valley of the Cracked Helm” Available Now!

My second pamphlet adventure, “Valley of the Cracked Helm,” is now available on DriveThurRPG!

ad (cracked helm)

Once a paradise at the heart of dwarfdom, the Valley of the Cracked Helm has lain forgotten for ages, lost to the vagaries of natural disasters, goblin invasions, and generational benders. Over the years since, its name has invoked only shame—furtive, deep-seated dwarven shame—for the valley is where the wild dwarves dwell. . .

Valley of the Cracked Helm is an off-beat scenario for old-school style games involving a hidden valley filled with tribal dwarven nudists and exploitative prospectors. It is formatted as a double-sided tri-fold brochure that contains everything needed to run the module. It includes:

  • A ready-to-run module suitable for ongoing campaigns and one-shots.
  • A detailed pointcrawl of the Valley of the Cracked Helm.
  • Dwarves Gone Wild!

(This pointcrawl scenario can be dropped into any classic fantasy campaign allowing gratuitous dwarven nudity. More setting than adventure, it encourages/requires referees to improvise or develop content further to fit their own needs. Low-level PCs may need to be lucky or clever to survive.)


“Thicc as Thieves” Now Available!

My first pamphlet adventure “Thicc as Thieves” is now for sale on DriveThruRPG. Pay whatever you want, but of course, support is welcome and appreciated.

Get it here and spread the word!

But that’s not all! Next month, I’ll be publishing another pamphlet adventure titled “Valley of the Cracked Helm.” It’s about dwarves. Naked, hairy, wild dwarves!

The Demon Palace of the Magician Wat-Thekres, Part Two

Second part of The Demon Palace of the Magician Wat-Thekres.

If I remember right, when I started drawing this, I was inspired by P. Craig Russel’s version of the ruins of Alkmeenon from has comic adaptation of Robert E. Howards “The Servants of Bit-Yakin” titled The Jewels of Gwahlur. (seen below)


Russel was able to really emphasize the expansive nature of Alkmeenon. The first time I read it I palpably felt the environs within the palace and city, its underground. It felt, despite being mostly abandoned, a living, breathing location where any number of mysteries and adventures could be encountered.



So here’s part two of the map! Beneath it, you’ll also find a compiled version of the entire map as it is thus far.




Combined Palace 1.jpg

Preview of “Thieves’ Guild Built in the Subterranean the [Insert Generic Anthropomorphic Urban Rodent God of Your Choice]”

For my faithful (few) readers!

Here is a preview of a book I’m putting together based upon my (only) popular post: Thieves’ Guild Built in the Subterranean Ruin of [Insert Generic Anthropomorphic Urban Rodent God of Your Choice]’s Temple.

I am revising and expanding the Thieves’ Guild to include stats for Necrotic Gnomes’ Old School Essentials system and including illustrations, all done (the universe willing) by yours truly. (This started at as a way to practice layout while working on Southfarthing Confidential but looked good enough I figured that it’d be a great idea to publish it.)

Anyway, I’m deep in layout, drawing, and writing and wanted to give you a preview, so here it is:

Thieves’ Guild Built in the Subterranean Ruin of [Insert Generic Anthropomorphic Urban Rodent God of Your Choice]’s Temple (cover)Thieves’ Guild Built in the Subterranean Ruin of [Insert Generic Anthropomorphic Urban Rodent God of Your Choice]’s Temple (6-7)Thieves’ Guild Built in the Subterranean Ruin of [Insert Generic Anthropomorphic Urban Rodent God of Your Choice]’s Temple (8-9)

Hex 0001 – Village of Pranfz and Surrounds

I recently purchased a bunch of these blank cardboard hexes from Amazon, but my plans to use them to build a map hex-by-hex as the PCs explored the region of my campaign world fell through due to laziness.

However, to avoid allowing them to gather dust and go to waste, I’ve discovered a new use for them: what I’m calling the Hex a Week (or Probably Month) post. Each week (or more likely month) I’m going to draw a map of a hex and post it along with location-of-interest details, random encounter tables, and a brief overview of the goings-on therein. In doing this, I hope to build an entire region for a sandbox campaign. Going forward, I’ve set for myself a few guidelines to work within for designing the hexes:

  1. Allow the setting and tone of the sandbox to emerge through the hexes themselves. No design takes place beforehand, outside of the hexes. Metaplots will emerge as more and more hexes and sites are developed. Everything is local.
  2. Each hex is 6 mi. across and will contain 1d3+1 sites of interest. These sites may be major or minor, important or simple window-dressing. Relationships between sites will be developed over the course of the development of the hexes.
  3. Roll a 1d6 to determine the next hex that will be developed in relation to the current hex.

There probably should be more, but I think these will suffice to set things in motion, so without any further explanation, here’s Hex 0001:

Hex 0001 – The Village of Pranfz and Surrounds

Hex 0001

1. The Village of Pranfz

Within the logging village of Pranfz all of the women are said to be witches. These rumors are, of course, vicious lies spread by travelers who observe the village’s odd marital customs.

For weeks at a time, the men of Pranfz log the Murmuring Weald, a forest to the west of their village, only to return for a single day and a night to deliver their timber for sale to traveling merchants. They spend this night in the beds of their wives.

The fear of the village men, however, is not for the women of Pranzf, but sheer terror at facing the jealousy of their forest wives. The identities of these beings, or even certainty of their existence, is unknown to the women of Pranfz. What is known is that when a boy comes of age and he joins his father, his uncles, and grandfathers in the Murmuring Weald to gather timber, he abandons his relationship with his female relatives. Marriages are forced affairs, predetermined by the village’s elder women, and the men only copulate with their wives on nights they are home under the darkness of the new moon. All weddings in Pranfz happen on the night of the new moon.

2. The Lavender Bridge 

A single tower rises from the western end of this covered bridge built of  light purple stone stones. The tower sits at the northern end of a barbican that guards access to the bridge and the crossing along the Lowly Road where it approaches the bridge on its western side.

The bridge’s tower serves as the home of Tanzel, a ruddy-cheeked and red-haired man who, decade after decade, appears to be perpetually nearing 50 years of age. He always bears a smile underneath his voluminous, walrus-style mustache.

Tanzel offers sundries for purchase by travelers. These include most goods found on the general equipment list, though the more expensive items may be unavailable or in limited quantity (according to the Referee’s taste), as Tanzel does not keep a full store. Most of the goods he acquires come from merchants who’ve bartered for passage across the Lavender Bridge. In addition to these goods, Tanzel will attempt to sell travelers the strange fish he catches in his nets below the bridge from the

Often, during conversation in an off-hand manner, Tanzel will refer to his “brother” who lives with him at the bridge, but never is this brother seen by visitors. Rumors tell that the bridge is more than it seems and offers not only passage across the Lavender River but across the stream between realities into the weird Otherworld said to exist alongside this one. As well, the bridge is said to have secret chambers built within its broad pilings.

3. The Slug Caverns 

Here be slugs of unfortunately usual size for the region. While hunting them is dangerous work, doing so is lucrative work. Slug eggs are a delicacy in both Pranfz and the nearby city of Zfanfen. As well, alchemists, wood-women, and other dabblers in the fine art of questionable brewing.